Seven years ago today I stopped hitting snooze on my alarm clock in the morning and started my Fitness First ritual.
In the beginning, it wasn’t about creating a “fitness habit.”
This was about breaking my habit of hitting snooze.
At the time, I didn’t see it as a decision to “say yes to myself first.” I wasn’t thinking in those terms, although, looking back, it certainly applies.
I had been saying yes to everyone else, putting everyone else’s needs before my own. I constantly pushed off my morning workout for “later” but later never came. When it did, I was too exhausted.
I was so busy reacting to the ping of social media, my inbox, my clients, the demands of other people, the expectations for how I had to show up, to consider what I wanted.
I was on a path to a destination. There would be time when I got there. Except that I had never stopped to consider “Where am I going? And, is that even where I want to go?”
I was constantly on the go, running from place to place, running from one appointment to the next. Running on empty.
There is a cost to this way of life, and not just financial. The cost is also physical, emotional, mental and spiritual. I got sick often, felt disconnected from others and myself.
I was tired of living in the pain of trying to be what everyone else was expecting me to be. Tired of trying to live up to high expectations and the pressure to be a certain way. Tired to pushing off what I needed and disappointing myself.
I was tired of waiting for my turn. Tired of waiting for whatever needed to happen for life to begin.
Most of all, I was tired of feeling tired.
I had been a chronic snoozer for years. I used to set the alarm for an hour earlier than I really had to wake up so that I’d have time to hit snooze.
The thing about the snooze button is that it’s a false sense of rest. It actually leaves you more tired.
My wake up call came from my mentor Loren Lahav. On a group call she told a story and asked:
How long will you continue to snooze on your life?
Her question struck hard and true, like an arrow to the heart.
I wasn’t just hitting snooze on the alarm in the morning.
I was snoozing on my life.
There’s a common belief that to make a change you need to know what you want and have a compelling WHY.
That’s BS. Sometimes you need to let go of a thing before the next thing comes into focus.
I knew what I didn’t want: to stay stuck in this pattern even for one more day. In that moment, I resolved: no more snooze.
That was enough. It was a place to start.
All it takes is one decision, one moment, to break a pattern. And everything else flows from there.