How do you respond when the people in your life aren’t open to trying or learning about things that you are passionate about?
For many years, I served on the crew for Tony Robbins’ events. Inevitably over the course of a weekend, I’d speak with participants who would ask me
What’s the best way to convince my spouse/colleagues/boss/friends to come to this event?
I also met many participants who, despite their best efforts, couldn’t persuade someone in their life to attend the event. Sometimes the refusal by the person to even consider it was a source of agitation in the relationship.
The Things You Want to Share With the World
Inevitably you will come across something that excites you and that you want to share with the world.
An app. A workout. A routine. A framework. A productivity hack. A topic of interest. A hobby. A food. An approach to an old problem. The latest supplement. The latest vacation spot. A new method.
It doesn’t have to be a new thing. It could be an an ancient art form. An old philosophy. Frameworks that have long been discarded.
A mentor or coach or personality who you find inspiring.
An experience or event.
Your excitement will convince you that everyone else you know needs to try this thing too.
It’s a natural phenomenon that when we find benefit in something, we believe that other people will experience the same benefit. And we can quickly become evangelists for that thing.
This can sometimes lead us to be overbearing in our attempts to convince everyone that they need this thing in their life.
Meeting the Inevitable Skepticism
When you do start to share this thing you love, you will inevitably meet skepticism and criticism.
It’s almost guaranteed that you will meet criticism of the thing it self.
Sometimes, that judgment may extend to you, too. A perception about you because you are interested in that thing.
It can be a frustrating experience when people in your life — especially those close to you — are not on board with trying, or even learning about, the thing you are so passionate about.
If you have good rebuttals to the skepticism, it can be useful to address those skeptics who are at least somewhat open-minded to changing their opinions.
In general, however, it’s a waste of your energy and time to try to convince people who have closed their minds to whatever it is.
A more constructive use of your energy is to direct your attention to people who are open minded.
The Best Form of Persuasion
Once you find those people, the best approach is to share what you find valuable about the thing you love and your experience with it.
The best form of persuasion is to share stories that show how this thing — whatever it is — has impacted your life for the better.
Some examples:
If it’s an *event*: What did you get out of it? How did it change your perspective?
If it’s a *tool*: How do you use it? How has it changed your approach for the better? What have you gotten from it?
If it’s a teacher, a framework, or *mental model*: How has it changed your outlook or your process?
If it’s a *workout*: How has it impacted your body and your energy levels?
You Won’t Win Over Everyone
It’s important to accept that you won’t win over everyone. Some people simply won’t have an interest in the things that light you up.
That’s on you to accept, and to let it be.
If they judge you for your interest, or denigrate it — or you — you have the choice to leave them out of your life.
That said, when you can show people how the thing that excites you has impacted your life for the better, they’re more likely to at least consider learning more about the thing you love. They may even be more open to trying it out.
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