For the past several months I have been saying a daily self-love meditation/prayer that I adapted from Louise Hay’s book Heal Your Body.

Recently, one specific line jumped out at me:

I only attract loving people in my world, for they are a mirror of who I am.

I paused to consider it more deeply, and wondered:

What would my life look and feel like if I actually believed this?

Not just if I believed it in my mind, but if I truly embodied this belief?

There are two parts to this to explore.

Part 1: Everyone is a Mirror

First is the piece that everyone and everything I attract into my world is a mirror of who I am.

This part is something I already believe.

Everyone is a reflection of a part of us. That which we admire in others reflects a part of us. Also, that which we see in others that repels us also exists within us. This is the hard piece for many of us to accept. That which we see in others that we most dislike reflects a part of ourselves that is in our shadow. We reject it in others because we reject it in ourselves.

This is true for qualities we consider “positive” and “negative,” although we most often have difficulty seeing the “negative” within ourselves.

We can use this to bring our shadows into the light. Whenever I encounter someone who triggers within me a particularly strong reaction, I try to pinpoint the specific qualities or traits that are sticking out for me. Then I can look within myself to see where those traits exist.

Part 2: I Am Loving Therefore I Attract Loving People

The second part is more tricky.

What if I believe that everyone I attract into my life is loving, because I am loving?

First, I have to believe that I am a loving person. I suppose we all want to believe this about ourselves, but, to be honest, sometimes I don’t believe this. One reason I say this meditation/prayer daily is to condition that belief within myself.

More crucially, what does it mean when I encounter people who don’t appear to be loving?

How can I apply this when I am dealing with people who attack me or others, or whose words or actions appear to indicate malicious intent towards me or others?

I spent quite some time in inquiry about this, and here is where I am on it today:

The belief that I only attract loving people in my world invites me to find a perspective from which I can view their actions as loving. Some options:

(1) Maybe they are not acting in a loving way towards me, but they are acting in a way that honors their love for themselves.

(2) Maybe their words and actions are loving to someone who is not in my field of vision. I can remind myself that I don’t see the full picture from where I stand.

(3) Perhaps they hold an intention to be loving to me or others, not realizing that their actions aren’t aligned with that intention. Who among us hasn’t taken a misstep, even with good intentions? Many people do and say some horrible things in the name of love.

Ultimately, the point isn’t necessarily to find a positive spin on what the person is doing or saying. It’s to pause long enough to remember that what other people do and say has nothing to do with us, and everything to do with them.

Trust In Love

When I trust that I only attract loving people in my world, for they are a mirror of who I am, I am better equipped to meet people where they are. I can let their remarks and actions roll off of me.

To be clear: this doesn’t mean I have to “take abuse” from anyone.

When someone lashes out at me, I can choose to step away from their drama; I don’t have to be their victim.

I can detach from the situation with the confidence that their actions are not about me at all, but about them.

Ultimately, the work for each of us is to strengthen our beliefs that we are loving and deserving of love.

The choice to step away from the drama is an act of self-love that strengthens that belief.

I only attract loving people in my world, for they are a mirror of who I am.

Try it on. I’d love to hear what you experience.