Language is important. The words we use carry meaning. Word choice matters.
If the goal of the public conversation is to reduce the stigma associated with mental health issues, then we need to choose some new words.
This is Part 1 of a list of the mental health language I find particularly infuriating.
“Mental” Health
Here’s my question: Why do we call it mental health?
Drawing a distinction between different forms of health only reinforces the stigma against mental health challenges.
If you have the flu, people expect you to stay home from work. If you have cancer, they understand why you find it difficult to get to work. That compassion is missing when it comes to “mental health” issues. We reinforce the stigma when we jokingly refer to taking a “mental health” day as though it were any less important than staying in bed with the flu.
What we’re actually talking about when we refer to “mental health” are patterns of thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and actions.
If this was only about thoughts, it wouldn’t be such a big issue. What makes mental health issues so challenging is that thoughts lead to emotions, behaviors, and actions.
The mind and body are inextricably linked. Mental health is not just a function of the mind; the emotional patterns manifest in physical form.
What we call “anxiety” and “depression” have physical symptoms. These symptoms are both acute — appearing in the moment — and chronic — automatic physical responses that become habituated over time.
Our body/mind/emotions/spirit ecosystem functions as a complex machine. A problem in one area leads to a problem in others. Healing in one area heals others.
Taking care of one part takes care of all the parts.
Health is health.
Ownership and Identity
We quickly develop habits — unconscious thoughts, emotions, and actions in response to certain stimuli — that take over our experience.
If left unchecked, these thoughts, emotions, and actions begin to shape our perception of who we are. We claim ownership of them. They become our identity.
Consider how we speak about these “mental health” conditions:
I have depression/anxiety/ADHD/(fill in your favorite).
I am depressed/anxious/etc.
My anxiety gets in my way.
The strongest force that shapes our behavior is the need to remain consistent with our identity.
This becomes a self-reinforcing cycle:
We think in ways consistent with who we believe we are.
Our thoughts create our emotions.
Our emotions produce our actions and behaviors.
Those actions and behaviors lead to our results.
And our results reinforce our identity — our perception of who we are.
And then it repeats.
Why do we cling so tightly to these states that create our pain?
What if instead of having depression or anxiety, you experienced episodes of depression or anxiety?
Everything began to change for me when I asked myself this question.
Letting go of the identity around an emotion, thought, or behavior allowed me to step back from it and observe it.
What I saw was that it was this: a passing moment.
A pattern of response.
Mental, emotional, and physical reactions to a given set of triggers.
A set of strategies that my mind and body use when faced with certain challenges.
They do not define who I am.
And they do not define who you are.
Because who you are is so much bigger than any passing emotion or thought. Even if that thought is a spiral of thoughts that seems to camp out in your brain for long stretches.
The more you refuse to allow any of these states to define you, the more quickly they will pass.
What if instead of having a condition, you experienced the feeling of that emotion?
I’d love to hear your thoughts on this. Please share in the comments. And check back tomorrow for Part 2.
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