What To Do When You Don’t Feel Like Doing Anything

What do you do when you don’t feel like doing anything?

Someone recently asked for advice about this topic. It’s a question that comes up frequently, so let’s walk through it.

(1) Get Clear and Specific

The first step is to get clear on specifically what you don’t want to do.

“Anything” is broad.

• Is it something you’ve committed to do?
• Something you actually do want to do but just don’t feel like it in the moment?
• Something you think you “should” do?

Second is to get curious about why you don’t want to do it

• Is it a “should” that you don’t see the point in doing?
• Is it something you want to do but currently don’t have motivation to do it?
• If so, why did you want to do it? Is it still relevant?
• Is it a future me vs present me thing? In other words: you know you’ll be glad you did it, but you don’t want to do it right now.

Here are some more questions to ask

• Are you tired? Hungry?
• Is part of you being pulled somewhere else? See part 3.
• What’s the urgency pulling you away from what you want to do? See part 3.
• Do you have some fear or other resistance coming up?
• Do you fear the thing itself or the consequence of it?
• Is there something pulling you away from it?
• Are you lacking in resources, skills, or support to do the thing?

Be honest about what you need to do it.

(2) Establish Rituals, Routines, and Rules

Having rituals, routines, and rules around the things I know I want to do but don’t always feel like doing — like working out, writing, and meditation — frees me from the debate about “not wanting to do it” and from the mental chess of trying to figure out when I might do it “later.”

For the things you know you want to do consistently, commit to yourself that you will do them, and put them in your schedule.

• Establish rituals and rules.
• Create a plan or routine around it.
• Put it in your calendar.
• Follow your plan.
• Decide on the minimum you will commit to. What is good enough?

Allow yourself to cut back on time spent.

Do less, but do something.

Sometimes the moments when you don’t feel like doing it but you do it anyway can turn out to be your best moments.

Usually getting started is all you need to get going. Commit to a bare minimum. If you still don’t feel like it after 5–10 minutes, then move on.

(3) Notice: What DO you feel like doing?

Just as it helps to get clear on what specifically you don’t want to do, it also helps to get clear on what, specifically you’d rather be doing instead.

Maybe the feeling that you don’t want to do “anything” is really a feeling of wanting to do something else.

Maybe what you mean is “I don’t feel like doing anything productive.”

Or “I don’t feel like doing this thing because I want to do this other thing.”

Are you being pulled to the urgent when you really want to be doing something that is more important but lacks instant gratification or results?

If so, acknowledge it. Perhaps there’s a way to fit in both.

Maybe what you want to do is something mindless. Or something that feels “unproductive.”

Putting everything on the table can help you see why you’re getting stuck.

Here are some things I sometimes do when I don’t feel like doing anything.

• Reading old journals
• Organizing
• Cooking or baking
• Reading a book or magazine
• Watching a movie
• Planning
• Journaling
• Taking a walk
• Stretching

Notice how many things you can come up with that you might feel like doing when you say you don’t want to do anything. Make time for those things. They are all important.

And also notice that none of those things are “nothing.”

If you really don’t want to anything, read on for part 4.

(4) Do Nothing.

Radical, I know.

Here’s a question:

We are so conditioned to the belief that we must always be doing something that when we don’t feel like doing anything we immediately make it wrong.

Why is “not wanting to do anything” a problem?

Consider this: What if it’s not wrong?

What if this is not a problem that needs to be solved?

What if this is not a “bad” thing that needs to be fixed?

Maybe when you don’t feel like doing anything it’s because you really need time to rest and do nothing.

We all need spaces in our days and weeks to do nothing.

Especially in a winter season.

To be clear: doing nothing means actually doing nothing.

Not “read a book” or “scroll social media” or zone out in front of the tv.

Although if that’s what you need, then do that. Go back to part 3.

And also consider that sometimes we actually need to just do nothing. And maybe that is what you actually need.

So do nothing.

Sit on the floor or a chair or on the beach.
Be a bump on a log.
Watch the waves.
Stare at the sky.

Five years ago on a retreat in Panama I sat in a chair one day and literally watched the tide roll in. For hours. Like in the song.

I spent many hours watching the ocean.

Not burying my face in a book or in my phone. Not listening to a podcast. Not even sleeping.

Actually sitting in one spot and doing nothing.

Do not be fooled:

In a world that conditions us to always be doing something — especially something productive — doing nothing is often the hardest thing we can do.

It’s an act of rebellion.
It’s revolutionary.
And it is medicine for the soul.

In a world that conditions us to always be doing something — especially something productive — doing nothing is often the hardest thing we can do.

Learn to embrace it. Allow yourself to enjoy it. And savor it.