It’s a reality of life with ADHD that some days, despite your best efforts, you can’t seem to harness the focus for the big brain work.
Many days, I wake up feeling exhausted and unfocused from the start. Usually my meds and my workout help me get that feeling that my brain is “plugged in” so I can do what I need to do.
But sometimes, that doesn’t happen.
The Feeling: Not Plugged-In
The best way I can describe this state is that I don’t feel like I’m “plugged in” — like I’m trying to use an appliance where the plug isn’t fully in its socket.
I remain in a state that feels like a mix of brain fog and dissociation.
It’s like I’m going through the motions of my day but I’m not fully there.
On those days, even the most basic decisions become too much. If you have ADHD, you know these days well:
They are the days when you don’t eat, because even eating requires too many decisions. They are the days when you may feel like life is hopeless and you’ll never amount to much.
How can you salvage the day with any semblance of productivity? How can you navigate these days without feeling like a total bump on a log?
Before you do anything: remember that this is just temporary.
One day — and what you do or do not accomplish on that day — doesn’t define you.
Remember all those days when you were fully plugged in and riding a wave of hyper-focus to get more done in a few hours than most people do in a week.
The “dissociated” days are just the other side of that coin.
Here are some suggestions for how to navigate the day:
(1) Check-In With Your Life
Check in with what’s going on in your life and body. Are you under a period of high stress? Is there something out of the ordinary happening in your life? Where are you in your cycle? What’s the lunar phase? Are you in physical pain?
Periods of high stress, sudden disruptions to sleep and routine, being on your period, physical pain, and the full moon (yes, really) can all make symptoms worse.
It helps to check in so you know what you’re dealing with.
(2) Self-Compassion and Self-Care
On these days, self-compassion is the best medicine. Beating yourself up for a brain that doesn’t work well not only doesn’t help, but also is counterproductive.
As tempting as it might be to agitate your anger with self-criticism and self-judgment to kick-start your productivity, anger is an unsustainable source of dopamine that can lead to a bigger crash.
Check in with your body and brain to assess what it needs.
Maybe it needs a nap, or walk outside.
(3) Get Moving
Easier said than done, especially on days when you can’t even get yourself to eat. But try to just be a robot.
Staying still generally doesn’t help me in these situations. So I move at whatever speed I can.
One guideline I like to use is:
Move as slowly as necessary but as fast as possible.
Movement is medicine. Even if it’s a walk, or getting on hands and knees and doing some cat/cows, try to get yourself going.
If you can, put yourself in a situation where someone else is telling you what movements to do so you can eliminate decisions and just execute.
I track my workouts to see what helps me get that “plugged-in” feeling so that I can have a list of what works. That said, it’s important to remember that what worked yesterday may not work tomorrow.
Movement isn’t limited to your workout. Try to move as much as possible throughout your day.
If you have to be on a call, get up from behind your desk and take the call outside or pace around your office.
(4) Focus on Low Energy Tasks
I keep a list of low-energy tasks for days when I just can’t seem to plug in my brain. Or even higher energy tasks that are straightforward.
What you’re looking for are tasks that don’t require any major decisions, and as few minor decisions as possible.
Some things that can fit the bill are: cleaning, meal prep, folding laundry, and all the random errands you might have put off when you were in hyper-focus mode on other projects.
Alternatively, have someone else make the decisions for you on what to do, and you just execute. Sometimes half the battle of getting things done is the decision about what to do.
(5) Do Something You Enjoy
Create a pocket of time in your day to do something you enjoy purely for the sake of enjoying it.
Don’t do something because you need to do it, it will be good for you, or because it will be useful for something else.
Ideally, find some people to socialize with while doing the activity.
The combination of doing something pleasurable and connecting with others — in live, interactive, human form — can help kickstart the dopamine and bring some of your energy back.
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