There seems to be a myth in personal development circles, especially in spiritually-minded communities, that we should be happy all the time, always positive, radiating the emotions that keep us vibrating at our highest frequency.

This is especially true on social media, where everything has a pastel sheen.

What do we mean by “vibrational frequency”?

Before we get into the myth, what do we mean by vibrational frequency and high vibration vs low vibration?

Without going deep down the rabbit hole of “everything is energy,” here’s the takeaway:

When we vibrate at higher vibrations we feel expansive, connected, and free. Higher vibrational frequencies like love, compassion, and gratitude make us lighter. We move in flow, our creativity is magnified, we see possibilities.

Lower vibrational frequencies like fear, anger, and jealousy make us feel heavy, stuck, and sluggish.

Our intentions, thoughts and words can physically alter how we feel and the world around us.

So it makes sense that we want to be in a high vibration frequency as much as possible.

This is where the myth of “always be positive and happy” comes in.

People Who Are Always Happy Are Lying

You know those people who are always claiming that everything “fantastic” and “outstanding” and “awesome.”

They never seem to be hitting a funk or having a bad day, even a bad hour.

Have you ever noticed how f*cking annoying these people are?

Perhaps most annoying, if you’re in a funk, they want to impose their positive vibes on you. They want to fix things, to make it better.

One reason these people come off as annoying is that they are lying.

They are pretending that everything is great when it is not, suppressing their pain and frustration and overcompensating through feel good affirmations and an attempt to fix what’s wrong with you.

People who are faking it believe they are in a high-vibration energy. The truth is that they are in the lowest vibration frequency of all: resistance, suppression, delusion.

Notice that the people who are truly operating at a high vibration frequency don’t try to push their “good vibes” on you. They simply emit their energy and hold space for your experience.

Feeling Your Feelings is High Vibe

Bad moments and bad days happen. Not because your life is so terrible, or because you did something wrong, but because you’re human.

The world is rigged to help us forget our connection to ourselves and our source. As a consequence, we separate from ourselves.

We forget who we are and that we are deserving of love.

It’s inevitable, and natural, to find yourself in these places where you feel the low vibration frequencies. And it’s completely ok.

Not only ok. Necessary.

You must release your pain to feel light. And to release it you must feel it. Cry. Make the sounds of your emotions. Allow yourself to feel.

If you’re masking your pain, or suppressing emotions you don’t want to feel, you’re not in a high vibrational frequency. And no amount of affirmations is going to change that. The two cannot co-exist.

In those moments, you do not need to be fixed. There is nothing wrong with you. What you need is to hold space for your emotions.

Shifting Your Frequency

When you hold space for the low vibration frequencies — when you step back to witness and investigate your emotions with compassionate curiosity — you transform low vibration into high vibration.