One reason adults never seem to grow out of Halloween is that it’s an opportunity to assume a new role for a day. You get to be someone completely different.
When put on your Halloween costume, you don’t confuse the role you’re playing with who you are. You’re taking on a persona for the evening, playing a role.
You might remember your past Halloween “roles” fondly. But you move on; you aren’t attached to them. Those roles aren’t you.
Just because you dress up as Princess Jasmine doesn’t mean you’re actually a princess.
When Roles Become Identity
Life on the other 364 days each year is really the same. You play different roles in life. Each one has a costume. None of these roles define who you are.
Yet somehow we tend to treat the other 364 days of the year as different from Halloween, in that we tend to identify with the roles we play.
We equate what we do with who we are — but they are not the same.
When we allow the costumes we wear and the roles we play to define us, they become our identity. We can get attached to them, and stuck in them.
Read: Freedom Beyond the Masks
You Can Play Multiple Roles at Once
When other people attach to a role you play as your identity, it’s hard for them to see beyond it.
Part of the confusion comes from the mis-belief that the roles we play are who we are, and that we can be only one thing at a time — at least when it comes to professional roles.
This is where life differs from Halloween.
On Halloween, you can only wear one costume at a time. But in real life, we play many roles..
We “wear many hats” — different costumes for the different parts of us.
You’re a lawyer. An investment banker. A doctor. A real estate agent. A writer. An event planner. A consultant. A coach. A journalist. A personal trainer. A parent.
You can be many things at the same time.
The Freedom to Change Roles
Over the course of your life, you’ll naturally change some of the roles you play.
When you attach to any role as your identity, it’s hard to see beyond it — and grow beyond it.
Giving up that role feels like giving up a piece of yourself.
What if you could treat every role like a Halloween costume?
It’s a costume you wear, rather than who you are.
When that costume no longer fits, you get to take on a new role.
Even the best roles eventually get stale. The role you assume one year doesn’t have to be your role forever.
You can look back on it fondly without being caught up in the illusion that the role is who you are.
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