There’s a common myth that meditation will give us a feeling of being “blissed out” and zen. New meditators often think they’re “bad” at it when they don’t feel this way.
Some truth: meditation is often uncomfortable. Both physically and emotionally. Many forms of meditation or breathing practices can often stir things up.
The silence can be deafeningly loud.
As a culture, we prefer to sweep the uncomfortable emotions and experiences under the rug.
Nobody likes to talk about fear. Better to push past it or overcome it. Rather than honoring grief and loss, our culture implores us to get over it.
Discussing or showing emotions, speaking abut what’s really happening, is often viewed as a weakness. This is what we learn from the time we are young.
Don’t let them see you cry.
Anger isn’t ladylike.
Don’t get emotional.
Where “emotional” is really code for “emotions that we, as the public, are uncomfortable with seeing expressed in front of us.”
So all of these “negative” emotions get swept under the rug.
The rug has got pulled out from under us, and everything is getting exposed. The dust-storm of emotions is swirling in the air.
So if you’re noticing that all the shit is hitting the fan, that’s to be expected. This is part of the process.
But there’s a gift here, if you’re willing to receive it. Each particle of dust that has been kicked up is a messenger, here to offer you wisdom. You have to be willing to listen for it.
Sitting in the silence forces us to look at what we would rather sweep under the rug.
The way you find that place of bliss is build resilience to stress is not by pretending everything is ok, or by spreading positive motivational messages, but by leaning into what’s there: the fear, grief, anger, sadness, frustration, whatever it is.
Sitting with it. Investigating it, with compassionate curiosity.
Meditation may eventually bring you to that zen place, but only because you’ve gotten comfortable with being in the dust storm.
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