“Nobody wants to be friends with someone who doesn’t have money.“
This was my client’s belief, which he shared in response to my questions about his goal to achieve a certain net worth.
That he believed this wasn’t a surprise.
We live in a culture that places a premium on the tangible and material, things that can be quantified or qualified: how much money we have, the size of our house, what we know, what we can contribute.
As a result of this subtle conditioning, we can come to believe that these things define our value and our worth.
Even if we don’t quantify our value in terms of money or net worth, as my client did, we might believe that our value lies in what we give, what we do, or what we teach.
We often focus on the contribution — money, time, knowledge, expertise, services, or material goods.
This belief overlooks the importance of contributions that can’t be quantified.
When we are caught up in this belief, we minimize the value of listening to another person, cheering someone on, or offering emotional support.
We forget the value of caring or holding space for another person to be in their experience.
We overlook the potency of presence.
It’s these intangibles that nurture the soil of our relationships, that give our lives meaning and purpose, and that helps us feel love and belonging.
Showing up for someone else tells them they are worthy of receiving support, that their emotional state matters, and that their experience matters.
One of the greatest contributions we can give others is our presence.
When we offer that to others, it can fill us with a sense of meaning and purpose that will never be found in a bank account or the amount of content we produce.
It may be a cliché, but it’s true:
People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.
Your presence is enough.
Cultivate that and you will be rich beyond measure.
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