I am experimenting with doing less. I have to call it an experiment, otherwise I would fight it. Clarification: I would fight it more than I’m already fighting it. And I’m fighting it a lot.
Even though I say, daily, something’s got to give, I am loathe to do less.
Do Less = To give less than 100%. To put something in the world that is less than you know you can do, less than fully-thought through, less than comprehensive.
The idea of doing more is baked into my DNA.
I find a lot of people I know struggle with this idea of doing less.
Have you ever heard someone say,
It’s the least I could do.
That statement is often a lie. Nobody — at least nobody I know — does the least they could do.
Doing less feels lazy. It feels half-assed. It feels like taking the easy way out or phoning it in.
These are the markers of my anti-identity, everything I am not, everything I don’t do.
This week, my coach suggested I switch up my newsletter. Instead of my usual letter that shares an insight, he suggested I simply check in with my readers to ask how they’re doing.
I liked the idea. It was simple. Sincere. I genuinely wanted to know.
It was less.
And the thought of doing it made me physically ill.
My body contracted. A wave of nausea washed over me.
It was the discomfort of stretching/working something that hasn’t been used before. Which I was.
Everything in me said that’s not enough. It’s not a newsletter. It’s not adding value.
Even though I know full well that listening and holding space is the epitome of value.
This is the tension within me.
Every. Single. Day. I notice how much easier I could make it on myself if I stopped trying to do so much. I notice how I feel in the presence of others who do less, but by doing less actually give more. Because they aren’t over giving to the point that everyone around them is overwhelmed.
And yet, when it comes to actually implementing this in my own practice…
My whole system contracts in this weird resistance to doing less.
I agreed to experiment with doing less in my newsletter. There’s not much to lose. If it doesn’t work I can always go back to doing more.
That’s the thing: you can always do more. Doing more has no upper limit. On the other hand, doing less does have a limit, in theory. I am curious to discover: what is the least I can do?
There’s another aspect to this: I realized that if my experiment is successful — if I get the same or better results from doing less — I might realize that I could have been doing so much less this whole time.
The mere thought of this is nauseating. Kind of like finding out you’ve been paying double for something for years. It’s almost better not to know.
I speculate that this may be under the surface for many chronic over-doers.
But it feels important to find out. So I’m exploring. Experimenting.
It’s the least I can do.
Doing less is hard
But worth exploring to find
The least you can do
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