How to Meet People Where They Are

For everything we learn in life and every skill we acquire, whether it’s learning to drive, learning a language, building a business, or mastering a lift, we move through four predictable stages of learning and development.

The Conscious Competence model, which was developed by Noel Burch in the 1970s, describes these stages.

If you’re a coach, trainer, or service professional, understanding where a person is in this framework helps you meet them where they are and offer the support that they need.

Here are the four stages and how to serve a person at each stage.

Stage 1: Unconscious Incompetence = Ignorance

You don’t know what you don’t know.

You are looking at life through a keyhole, unaware of the broader perspective you’d see if you looked through the full doorway.

You’re taking action but it’s random, unstructured, and without a clear end goal. If it’s in the physical realm, like with your workout, you’re doing exercises incorrectly, in poor form, or the wrong exercises.

You just don’t know any better.

Many people stay here for years until someone opens their field of vision to see the bigger perspective, or educates them about what they could be doing differently.

A prospect who is at the stage of Unconscious Incompetence won’t buy your solution because they aren’t aware that they have a problem.

How to Serve: Your role here is education and creating awareness.

Stage 2: Conscious Incompetence = Awareness

In this stage, you are aware of the gaps in your knowledge or skills, but you don’t yet have the skills or tools to correct it.

This stage can be uncomfortable and frustrating. Now that your perspective has been widened, you see the gaps between where you are and where you could be. You want the skill, the knowledge, or the solution.

The longer you remain here, the more the tension builds. You know you need support to get to the next level.

How to Serve: Your role is to offer a compelling solution, guidance, and a clear path forward that helps them bridge the gap.

Stage 3: Conscious Competence = Learning

Conscious Competence is the learning stage. You are acquiring the knowledge and skill, but it’s not yet automatic. It requires significant thought, focus, and concentration. The cognitive load of the skill is still high.

In this stage, you might get frustrated as your skill ebbs and flows. You need support, reminders, or verbal cues for movement to execute in good form and with proper technique.

A person in the Conscious Competence phase needs reminders, guidance, and verbal cues, as well as reinforcement to build their confidence and capacity.

How to Serve: Your role here is teaching skills and knowledge, coaching, and feedback.

Stage 4: Unconscious Competence = Mastery

With enough practice and repetition of technique, you’ll eventually reach Unconscious Competence. This is where your knowledge or skill becomes second nature.

If you’re learning a language, this is fluency. If you’re learning a physical task, you can do it without thinking about it.

A person who has reached Unconscious Competence can still benefit from guidance and support; the key is to offer them the next-level solution that helps them refine their skills and knowledge.

One “risk” in Unconscious Competence is that when we’ve spent a long time in this phase we may not even be aware of what we’re doing well or how we’re doing it. That makes it harder to explain, teach, or intentionally build on our strengths.

How to Serve: Your role with a person in Unconscious Competence is refinement, reinforcement, and creating awareness of skills and knowledge the person is using well, so they can build on strengths.

Provide the Right Support

Every person you meet requires a different type of support.

The art of sales, coaching, and service is knowing where a person is and what they need from your in this moment.