engage with presence
release your expectations
This is part of a 7-week series exploring the seven core emotional attributes that drive human interaction, as presented by the Kabbalistic Tree of Life. These attributes are collectively called Sephirot. Each individually is a sephirah.
This week is week 6, and we are exploring the seven aspects of the sphere of Yesod.
Yesod is the foundation. It also speaks to connection, bonding, and integration.
Today is fourth day of Week 6, Netzach of Yesod.
Netzach is about sustainable endurance. More generally the quality of Netzach is about actively removing the obstacles that are in the way.
One practical way of considering today’s pairing is to consider:
What gets in the way of deep connection and bonding?
After all, we can’t remove what’s in the way until we identify it.
Here are 3 things that interfere with connection and bonding:
(1) Fear and Uncertainty
Anytime our nervous systems enter fight-or-flight mode, we are trying to survive. This can occur due to a real-life danger, an anticipated danger, situational uncertainty, or a long list of other things that cause our nervous systems to sound the alarms.
When we are in fight-or-flight mode we are just trying to survive. In this place we are physically unable to listen to another person, much less focus on them.
When we are angry at ourselves or judging ourselves we have no space to be open to others and how they are. Self-judgment leads to judgment of others.
Similarly when we feel judged by others, we go on the defensive, which can cause us to lash out at the people around us.
(3) Expectations of Others
Expectations or desires for how others should be, behave, act, feel, what they should do, and how they should react/respond.
Our expectations for how others should behave often causes us to be in resistance to how they are. We are no longer present to the person in front of us, thereby blocking connection.
Removing the Obstacles
Once we see the obstacles blocking us from connection, we can work to remove them by bringing love and compassion to ourselves and releasing our grip on how we think things should be.